Weird Rules to Follow by Kim Spencer

Thanks to NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this important book. It was released October 18, 2022, by Orca Book Publishers.

Weird Rules to Follow is based on the author's experience growing up in Northern British Columbia. It reads like a series of vignettes narrated by Mia, a half Tsimshian, half white girl, about the events of her life. These episodes, spanning a number of years, focus on both life within her family, and on her relationship with her best friend, Lara, a white girl who lives nearby. They include basketball tournaments, Christmas at Disneyland, berry picking, canning salmon, riding bikes around the neighbourhood, dance recitals, and school.

The title of this book refers to the different kinds of rules that govern the two girls lives. The consequences are profound. Mia notes that Lara has rules and then wishes she had more of them. In this instance it's about family rules that focus on the child's future. Yet in the general community, when there are rules, they are either not applied equally, or rules are different based on culture and class. Where white students might receive sympathy and support, Indigenous ones receive punishment and scorn. 

Mia and her mother live with her grandmother, a reclusive uncle, and a foster girl named Mary, on a cul-de-sac in the community of Prince Rupert. It's a small neglected house often filled with relatives. Lara and her family live in a large modern home full of modern amenities. The difference between the two lifestyles is a critical component of the book. Yet while Lara might have more materially, Mia is surrounded by extended family, love, and a way of knowing and experiencing the world that Lara misses out on. It's obvious that Mia's mother does her best for her no matter what. "Yes I got a new bike and it’s really cool, but I knew we couldn’t afford it. The bike came at a cost." This is because Mia needed braces. Her mother, even though she worked two jobs, couldn't afford to pay the family portion of them and get Mia a new bike. In the end, Mia had to choose what she wanted more. She chose the bike.  

One important thing I appreciated about this book is seeing issues from different sides. When Mia's mother wins $1000 at bingo, Lara's mother frowns and points out how much she lost before she won. When Mia tells her mother about this, her mom "rolls her eyes and says, "I know how gambling works! But it's entertainment - I do it because it's fun."

Some parts of this book made me laugh out loud. When Mia agrees to get a perm for picture day, it doesn't end up the way she anticipated. "I look like my mom and aunties. I'd fit right in at bingo." After she tries to fix it, she ends up looking like, "a dead ringer for Michael Jackson on the cover of his Thriller album."  At other times the humour is found in little quips like this one, "Grandma doesn’t watch basketball, probably because she’s Christian."

Sometimes I almost wept. Mia doesn't really fit in anywhere. She's either too Indigenous or too white. Microaggressions are commonplace. They arise from both outside and inside the Indigenous community. When Lara's bike is stolen, her father automatically assumes it was an Indian who took it. Mia's half-Indigenous older cousin says that his Indigenous mother told him, “not to marry an Indian”.  In the Ts’msyen town of Kitkatla, (referred to as out there or out home) where her family originates, she’s considered an outsider. When she's bullied by a group of girls, her mom takes them back to Prince Rupert. The most stark example of one of these aggressions is when Mia starts high school. Lara gets a locker on the main floor in the midst of where the rest of the white students are. Mia's locker is situated in the dingy basement with other indigenous learners. Upon reflection, this is much more than a micro aggression. It's an example of systemic racism in action. Mia and Lara's relationship suffers because of this and other experiences as they grow older. 

While this book is recommended for readers aged 11 to 13, I would recommend it to readers of all ages who are interested in understanding what it means to grow up Indigenous in this province. It's a must read for all teachers who work with First Nation learners.